Tag: Sexuality

  • Where I’m at #Periodically 32

    Where I’m at #Periodically 32

    The last couple of months have seen me finally achieve some sense of stability with pain management and general wellbeing. I’m able to exercise again, I’ve completed a round of psychosexual counselling and I’ve started a new chapter by beginning my masters in gender and sexuality studies at the LSE. But what do these changes mean for the #Periodically blogs? I’m not sure yet.

    My challenges are by no means over, some of them I haven’t even considered addressing yet. But after having shared so much, I’ve been enjoying sharing a little less lately. Now I know what I’m like, I’ll write and post a blog saying I’m stepping back from #Periodically and a week later my oversharing side will kick back in, that’s what happened the last time I considered reigning things in.

    Healthwise, I’m still facing new issues every month, but I’m finding it hard to tell whether things are connected or not or whether they’re just signs of life. And while I’m in considerably less pain, my acne is refusing to calm down and my body feels a bit like it’s beginning to override the pill (I have a horrible feeling about my next cycle, I hope I’m wrong!) I’ve reached the end of my journey with the urology department (I think) and it seems that despite my hunch, I’m all OK in that sense. Currently, I’m not in a frame of mind where I’m looking to open up another can of worms by investigating something else. This is a huge deal for me because it must mean that I’m doing something remarkable  — I’m coping!

    Despite being asked on the regs, I have no idea when I’m going to ‘get back out there’ romantically and sexually, but what I do know is that I have a lot to say about painful sex, vaginismus, female sexual dysfunction and sexuality in general, plus the effects all of these things have on your mental health and personal relationships. But I’m not quite ready to share them yet.

    This is the bit of the story that I feel is missing from #Periodically at the moment, and it doesn’t really fit into the category #Periodically, does it? So I’m toying with the idea that when I’m ready (don’t hold your breath), these conversations will come under a new banner, or maybe in an entirely different format altogether.

    So to repeat my earlier question, what’s next for #Periodically? I definitely want to cover a few more events and I would love to review a few more period products, but logistically I’m not menstruating regularly enough for that to work right now. (LOL, period logistics eh?!) I’ve been testing out the new release of Clue Plus and have some thoughts on that, so that’s to come, but most of all, I would really love to hear from #Periodically readers. You lovingly email and message me the nicest words of support, and now, if it’s not too much to ask, I would love to hear what blogs you’d like to read and what topics you’d like to see me cover. What’s more, if you want to write a guest blog for #Periodically, I am all ears! A) I want to broaden the experiences #Periodically covers and B) I have considerably less time for the blog at the moment, LSE is trying to suck all spare minutes out of my life…

    BASICALLY, I’d like to hear from you, so if you have any blog ideas or a guest blog pitch for me, please get in touch, by Twitter, Instagram or email.

  • Becoming a Podcast Person

    Becoming a Podcast Person

    A million years late to the game, I have finally delved into the wonderful world of podcasts. I think there’s always been a lot of content out there that intrigued me but I never knew when exactly to listen to podcasts. I prefer working and writing in pin-drop silence, in my downtime or on the train I read, when I drive I sing and when I walk the dog I listen to music and *sometimes* pretend I’m in a OTT music video… I was pretty set in my ways and didn’t much like the idea of mixing those habits up.

    In the end, it took a podcast I couldn’t resist to finally get me to reassess when I could make time for podcasts. What was it? About Race with Reni Eddo-Lodge. I’ll get into the why and wherefore in a moment, but for me, About Race was a gateway drug into the world of podcasts. I tweeted asking for recommendations a few weeks ago, but please, let me know what else is good. For now though, here are the podcasts I’ve started with.

    (Oh, and if you’re interested, dog walking is now podcast time. It’s fine, I can do the music video thing in the car too).

    About Race – Reni Eddo-Lodge

    Earlier in the year I read Eddo-Lodge’s debut non-fiction book Why I’m No Longer Talking to White People About Race. You’ve probably heard of it because it’s been a huge success. It is brilliant. The history of race in the UK is long and complicated, rich and relevant, and I somehow got to university before it was ever really mentioned to me in an educational setting – that’s maddening.  While I loved Why I’m No Longer it left me wanting more… And then the podcast came along and was even better than the bloody book.

    https://twitter.com/renireni/status/994464605312311296

    About Race is a discussion about the racial history of the UK from the ‘recent past’ to now with political, cultural and academic guests who explore the ins and outs of key events in British race relations, how we can learn from disasters, repeat success stories and so much more. Guests range from Akala to Lily Allen’s mum Alison Owen, Diane Abbott to Gabby Edlin, Owen Jones to Meera Syal, Laurie Penny to Nish Kumar. It really is amazing and is essential listening if you want to better understand 2018 Britain.

    Here’s hoping a second series will be coming soon!

    My Dad Wrote a Porno – Jamie Morton, James Cooper & Alice Levine

    Surprise to no one, when I mentioned I was dabbling in the world of podcasts, this was recommended to me by a number of people, I can’t imagine why… I’ve known about it for years but I’ve always been intimidated by the fear of never being able to catch up. Again, surprise to no one, catching up hasn’t been that difficult – how could it be when it’s so funny? My Dad Wrote a Porno is pretty well-known now (they’re doing live shows at the Albert Hall) but in case anyone doesn’t know the premise; Jamie’s father, “Rocky Flintstone,” has self-published his erotica Belinda Blinks. Jamie and his friends then rinse the novels on an extraordinarily popular podcast. What’s not to love?

    Banging Book Club – Hannah Witton, Lucy Moon & Leena Norms

    While I’m not a book club fan myself, there was no way I could avoid a podcast on books about sex. I’ve just been dipping in and out of this one as and when I’ve read the books they cover. So far, I’d say it’s pretty banging.

    Project Pleasure – Anouszka & Frankie

    Having followed Project Pleasure on Twitter for a while, when I finally opened up to podcasts it was at the top of my list. I’ve really enjoyed what I’ve heard so far – sex positive conversations where female pleasure is a priority. Sex educator Alix Fox features occasionally, as they discuss sex ed, porn, masturbation, sexuality, periods and lots more of the good stuff.

    Unexpected Fluids – Alix Fox & Riyadh Khalaf

    This one is much less intimidating because I actually found it around the time it came out (recently) so there’s not as much pressure to catch up. It’s a podcast about bad sex – again, right up my street isn’t it? So far, the first couple of episodes have been, as the title would suggest, more about icky/sticky/funny sex than the depressingly painful sexual chit chat I spend so much time talking about, which is a much needed break. Alix Fox is one of the hosts and Hannah Witton features, suggesting that the world of British sex podcasts is a rather small one. This does mean you occasionally get the odd identical anecdote.

    My Gilmore Girls inspired mantra for dating is: “every bad date is a good anecdote for the next,” and Unexpected Fluids applies this to sex. Except it’s more, “every bad hook up is a good anecdote for a BBC podcast.” Standard.

    Ctrl Alt Delete with Emma Gannon

    I won’t lie, most of my motivation for this podcast came from the fact that Dawn O’Porter features on multiple occasions and I love her. Reni Eddo-Lodge also features but I’m yet to listen to that episode. The talk with O’Porter that I’ve listened to so far, was particularly interesting to me because like in the more personal episodes of About Race, there’s a lot of talk about freelancing and I need as much advice as I can get. All the conversations about going freelance, from this podcast, About Race and the one below, have been really morale boosting which is so refreshing when so many people tell you, “you’re totally doomed.”

    https://instagram.com/p/Bf0rOlcH7Fu/

    In Good Company with Otegha Uwagba

    Again, you might’ve heard of Uwagba because of her hugely successful “Little Black Book” – a career handbook for creative working women. She’s also the founder of Women Who. Her book is still on my TBR for now, but I was led to her podcast by About Race, which signal boosts other great podcasts at the end of each episode. Again, I’m here for the freelance chat, but it’s also great to hear real, gritty, serious and amazing success stories from women in creative businesses.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BexpyuKHjjD/?taken-by=oteghauwagba